Meet the Minds Behind the Madness at Lampoon Times
Left to Right: Chuck Factman, Grant Schemez, J.R. Rantsworth, Lance Leftwing, Seymour Outrage, Stu Pendous, Tina Tellzall & Warren Peace.
If it’s serious, they’ll mock it. If it’s mockable, they already did.
The award winning writers of Lampoon Times are a rogue gallery of ink-stained wretches, ex-press secretaries, disillusioned academics, and caffeine-powered keyboard warriors who sharpen their wit daily against the grindstone of absurd reality. With backgrounds in journalism, comedy, political science, and general mischief, they tackle current affairs, global politics, and world events with the grace of a freight train and the insight of a tipsy oracle.
Equal parts sarcastic scribes and reluctant prophets, their mission is simple: to expose the madness of modern life one satirical punchline at a time.
J.R. “Red Pen” Rantsworth is the ink-stained founder and editor of Lampoon Times. He is known for wielding a blood-red pen like a saber of judgment, he fact-checks fiction and fiction-checks facts.9 Articles
Chuck Factman, our News and Politics correspondent, is a blunt, boots-on-the-ground Texan who calls it like he sees it—usually red, white, and righteous—with opinions as unfiltered as his morning cup of diesel-strength coffee.6 Articles
Lance Leftwing, our News and Politics correspondent, is a passionate progressive with Bernie vibes, a bullhorn for justice, and a habit of turning every press conference into a protest—preferably powered by oat milk and outrage.5 Articles
Stu Pendous is our sports correspondent who lives for chaos, hot dogs, and overtime. Equal parts commentator and crazed fan, he yells opinions louder than the crowd and considers tailgating a sacred journalistic responsibility.5 Articles
Grant Schemez, our Business News correspondent, is a slick-talking Wall Street insider who explains financial corruption with charm, a smirk, and insider tips he swears aren’t illegal—just “creatively leveraged for journalistic efficiency.”4 Articles
Tina Tellzall, our entertainment and gossip correspondent, is a fiery pop culture sleuth who exposes Hollywood secrets faster than publicists can deny them—armed with sass, scandal, and a Rolodex full of restraining orders.3 Articles
Seymour Outrage, our Canadian news correspondent and opinion writer, is an uptight maple-scented stickler who files furious columns on minor inconveniences, national scandals, and improperly stacked Timbits—with grammar as strict as his sense of civic duty.2 Articles
Warren Peace, a sharply dressed international correspondent, brings biting commentary and British disdain to global affairs, covering revolutions, royal scandals, and poorly made espresso with the elegance of Bond and the patience of a hangry aristocrat.2 Articles
