The writers shaping tomorrow’s headlines—by completely making them up today.
The Lampoon Times authors aren’t just scribblers with Wi-Fi and questionable ethics—they’re seasoned satire specialists trained in the ancient art of public mockery, caffeine abuse, and typo denial. Armed with bloodshot eyes, outdated laptops, and dangerously inflated senses of humor, they risk everything (including their last brain cell) to bring you the most half-true truths this side of Twitter.
Our newsroom runs on a strict editorial policy: if it sounds too dumb to be real, it probably already happened. We don’t follow journalistic standards. We stalk them, poke them with sticks, and whisper weird things in their ear until they file a restraining order.
You may recognize our authors from other groundbreaking publications such as:
- The Filibust-Herald
- The Federalist Post-Post
- Better Homes & Hoaxes
- …. and CelebriTears Gazette
Award-Winning Mediocrity, Recognized Globally
At Lampoon Times, we don’t just write satire—we win wildly unverified awards for it.
We were honored with the Fullitzer Prize for Excellence in Exaggeration after publishing a 17-part expose on politicians hoarding compromising images of each other. Our staff also proudly holds three Lampy Awards, given annually by ourselves, to ourselves, in a ceremony involving a rotating cheese plate.
And who could forget the prestigious PeaBran Award, granted for “Outstanding Achievement in Accidental Journalism,” after we correctly predicted more tourists would fall into the Grand Canyon taking selfies… six months early.
These totally legitimate honors are proof that, when it comes to fake news, we’re not just participants—we’re pioneers. Or at least, pioneers in faking being pioneers.
Equal parts sarcastic scribes and reluctant prophets, the mission of our Lampoon Times authors is simple: to expose the madness of modern life one satirical punchline at a time.
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